Posted by: King Bee | June 3, 2008

Rebooting my system.

I’m at work right now.
I’m writing this at work right now.
My desk is piling up with chores and fires.
My extinguisher doesn’t seem to be putting them out as fast as the hot air from the people fans them.
I was in the middle of a project.
A time consuming project.
One that involves Excel, spreadsheets, calculations and formulas.
Half way through, my computer crashed.
Just turned off.
Nope. I hadn’t saved it yet.
Only saved the first couple of lines.
You’d think I’d have learned my lesson.
It was just a couple of months ago that my computer died.
Lost everything.
Had never backed up a single kilobyte.
My computer has a backup these days.
But it didn’t help me save my document.
So I decided to blog.
Let the flames burn.
I’m feeling burned out.
I need to reboot.
My life is good.
I’m generally happy.
I know I have it better than most.
But I also recognize happiness and contentment are relative.
Life is relative.
My trainer has taken to calling me an ox.
Yes, I have been going to a trainer.
Twice a week since February.
You wouldn’t know it.
I just keep adding mass.
Muscles building under layers of a life guided by emotionally eaten food.
Food to celebrate.
Food when depressed.
Food to exist.
Food appreciation.
No, I am not being diligent on my diet.
Just typing the word diet makes me cringe.
I enjoy food.
I enjoy life.
We are all going to die anyway.
I’ve met plenty of people who are thin who are nowhere near happy.
In fact, I think it is safe to say a lot of them are fucked up.
I don’t think I am fucked up.
But maybe that way of thinking makes me fucked up.
Who knows?
All I know is my trainer is now calling me an ox.
Not a panther or a gazelle.
But a strong farm sowing animal.
I told him to tie a harness around me and I could till his fields.
I am stronger and in better shape than I have been in over two years.
Maybe even five.
I’m also getting older.
June 27th ring a bell?
It’s ringing a loud gong in mine.
Another year older.
Life keeps speeding up as my metabolism slows down.
Hilary is throwing in the towel.
I don’t blame her.
I’d like to go on vacation with her.
Bill could come too of course.
That sounds good.
A nice opportunity to stop.
To breathe.



  1. Don’t give up the ship my friend. Take it from one who is trying one more time to conquer that food pyamid. Although I do not have a trainer – the gym has become my friend. At least for now. But it’s only been 4 weeks. The results are beginning and keeping me motivated. If I can do it at 50 you my young friend can do it to. Don’t look at June 27th as another year old – look at it as a chance to start fresh. And there is nothing wrong with being strong and healthy. Some of us were born to be pencil thin and some of us have some junk in the trunk. Just make sure that the junk is healthy junk and you’ll be just fine. xoxoxoxo

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